March 2009
1 post
February 2009
3 posts
I just returned to Asheville from my two-day mini-jaunt to Atlanta and brought back far more than a suitcase worth of memories.
First, the very sight of the city skyline elicited a deep sense of appreciation and love. Atlanta is my home. The sights and sounds of the city welcomed me back, and I received them openly and with a glad heart. It has been so long since I left, and we didn’t part on...
Dear Atlanta,
I will be coming to see you this week. I hope that we can get some things straightened out, and I hope that you will not be mad at me for having abandoned you for over a year now. You know I love you, and I have thought of you every day since I left you, but things are different now and it’s imperative that you know where I stand.
The relationship that we once shared was amazing, way back...
After completing myriad pros/cons lists and various other diagrams and charts (even one that ended up resembling a beautiful, albeit dead tree), I have decided to move back to Atlanta in August.
Feelings about the decision include (but are not limited to):
Excitement, dread, joy, happiness, confusion, sadness, ad infinitum.
I made a very tentative five-year plan. I don’t even know what...
January 2009
25 posts
The Big Picture's Inauguration of the 44th... →
melk:
(via thomasfitzpatrick)
Hospitality industry job + economy woes = royally fucked
Due to hours being drastically cut at my work (the hotel industry), I have earned enough money to pay rent and one bill. That leaves a second and third bill and food.
Situation, dire.
The means to which I am willing to go to make money just to fucking survive is…
Well, suffice it to say that I subscribe to the idea that what one...
Thirteen months later...
I still see ghosts. Everywhere. In the eyes of loved ones. From behind closed doors, they jump out at me, but somehow, incredibly, I am safe and I am not afraid.
Sometimes I feel as if I am in a whirlwind and it’s all around me, circling, screaming, waiting…
But I feel peace.
I see the same demons that I have known so well dwelling in the souls of people all the time. I can...
Phenomenon:
The vast majority of boys/young men in Christian youth groups are extremely fey and appear to be gay. So do a lot of the youth leaders.
Compensation, I presume.
I am hitting D.C. from Sunday ‘til Tuesday for the inauguration.
Nanner Nanner.
Bush’s farewell speech totally almost made me choke up, not due to its content, but due to the fact that he is leaving the White House as the biggest failure of a President the US has ever known.
I just feel bad for him.
And I also think that I almost shed a tear knowing that Obama will take over in five days. And I’m hopeful, and a little nervous. I really want this one to be a...
“One’s suffering disappears when one lets oneself go, when one yields - even to...”
– ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Southern Mail, 1929, translated from French by Curtis Cate (via simple-complex)
I got a bank account today. And I’m going to DUI school on January 31. As far as I can tell, on February 4, I will have regained everything material I lost in my speedy, reckless descent into the bottle.
Apartment, check. Great friends, check. Health, check. Sanity, check. Money in the bank, check. Check, check, check.
I feel fortunate.
A friend and I went to a late lunch today...
Comments enabled. Not soliciting. Merely informing.
Unprecedented Numbers of Americans Question... →
melk:
via poplicks.com
Cool rainy days make me want to stay in bed.
Deux Mille Huit
[ ] stayed single [X] got kissed [X] kissed someone new [X] kissed in the snow [ X kissed in the rain [ ] had my heart broken [ ] broke someone else’s heart [ ] had a stalker [X] lost a friend [X] had a good relationship with someone [ ] questioned my sexual orientation [ ] came out of my closet [ ] got pregnant [ ] had an abortion [ ] got married [ ] had a divorce [X] kissed...
“Hamas was elected in free elections in 2006. The US and Israel responded by...”
– Paul Craig Roberts (via azspot) (via melk)
Dragonette - I Get Around
I love this...
I feel restless tonight. Things on my mind:
Atlanta. Why? I have nothing left there save maybe, like, two friends. Whoot. And if I went back it would be a fuck of a lot different. I don’t exactly have the same lifestyle I did when I was living there. Nope. Not by a long shot. I miss the energy and excitement I think…
College. Yes? No? I don’t think so right now. ...
melk:
erykah badu - cleva (captain planet...
melk:
mattypie:
what is this? it’s cute.
Sia. ...
Fanfuckingtastic.
Is it wrong to hope that Sen. Pell’s death means more grants in his honor this academic year?
I still haven’t heard anything from my FAFSA bullshit, and really don’t expect to before classes start. I have already paid my enrollment deposit, but I am seriously weighing my options at this point.
I know I will have a degree to display (ignore) on some rented wall one day, but I...
Israel rebuffs calls for Gaza truce | Reuters →
melk:
fuck you, israel.
I’ll co-sign that.
Pibb Xtra at midnight and phone calls to family members that I can’t be near. Pride in knowing that I stayed sober another holiday. Joy and peace at midnight despite having to work third shift….
Note to self: THIS is what someone sober does to ring in the New Year. I hope I never forget it…
December 2008
22 posts
On this, the biggest drinking day of the year, I woke up with a super-high awareness of what I was going to be dealing with tonight at work and how I am going to handle every potential sticky situation.
The moment my feet hit the floor, really, I was met with the realization that I will be dealing with more drunk people than I’ve had to deal with in my year+ of sobriety. I am not scared of...
I love how...
I love how America stands by Israel at all costs, regardless of really searching for facts or basis of military action. I love how Condy has already released a statement condemning Hamas and is blaming all the violence on them and their inability to respect a cease-fire. I love how no matter who does what to whom in the Middle East, America will always, ALWAYS, back Israel seemingly without even...
Sometimes...
when I’m stressed the fuck out and I’ve tried to calm my nerves by every rational means possible, I can only find serenity by looking up airfares and accomodations for vacations that I know I won’t be taking anytime soon, if ever. I get so wrapped up in planning my trip that I forget my troubles, if only for a few moments, and it helps.
I don’t think that’s normal.
Sia — Paranoid Android
Yummy.
It's Christmas...
and my father still hasn’t said a word to me. For over a year.
He gives presents to my sister-in-law and brother, welcomes them into his home…
Nada.
I know. Boo hoo. Whatever.
That’s one birthday and two Thanksgivings and Christmases…without a word.
I tell myself not to get ill, to stay upbeat (“Who needs him?”), but it still smarts to be forgotten by...
Happy Thursday
Why is it that on this, the “happiest” and most family-oriented day of the year, I am making excuses not to go down and join mine?
Aside from my parents, I feel completely unrelated to and disinterested in everyone here.
That’s why.
Each Christmas, I want more and more to stay in my own world, niche and life away and celebrate in my own fashion. I want to be among friends.
...
alltimelow:
holga:
squidet:
The Ting Tings -...
Happy Holidays
After work, I am celebrating pre-Navidad with my boyfriend, Andres, (I like to say “Latino Claus” is dropping by! “Gringo Claus” has already come…) and then heading down to the G-A for a couple of days to spend the holiday with my family. I am unsure if I will be back on before my departure in the morning, so I wanted to take this opportunity to wish everyone a very...
Smarting, is:
-Four of five fingers on my left hand that I burned with boiling water from an industrial coffee pot as soon as I came into work. Bad burns.
-My spirit from being lied to by someone I care about dearly.
Oh, fuck.
Michael Jackson forced to prove Billie Jean was... →
This has got to be one of the most wildy entertaining ironies…the world has ever seen.
Oh please be true.
When I was drinking, I would look back on the fragments of the day and try to piece them together…and realize that I had consumed a frightening, frightening amount of vodka.
Sometimes I still feel that way today, except my days are not fragmented, and the vodka is now sugar.
…no wonder I’ve gained 25 lbs. this last (sober) year.
Fuck it. At least I remember gaining it.
Note...
“Life is occupied in both perpetuating itself and in surpassing itself; if all it...”
– Simone de Beauvoir
1 tag
Not nine, not noon.
I’ve been sober one year today (if we are considering “today” Saturday at this late hour…).
One whole year without drinking. Man.
MAN.
I couldn’t make it until 9AM without drinking. I couldn’t leave the apartment (no, never in a million years) without shots of vodka. Never ever EVER.
And now, not 9, not noon…a year.
I’ve been asked by a...
PS.
I totally want to be a travel writer.
1 tag
I’m 24 and I still don’t really know what the fuck I want to do with my life (Does anyone?).
I’ve spent a good deal of time looking over major and minor options at UNCA and I’m really kind of…blah. At the previous two universities I attended, there was a HOST of majors and minors. I was well on my way to earning a degree in Journalism (with a concentration in...
